Boots in the Oven

IMBB XXV: Panade - the Phoenix of Stale Bread

The beauty of this dish is that it’s so simple. It revels in its proletarian roots and it’s this very lack of pretension that makes it so delicious and appealing. Unlike my prose.

This is truly a left over dish. When all you have is old bread and salt water, a couple of onions and a hunk of rapidly hardening cheese, the provincial panade is the savory butterfly that emerges from the austerest of cocoons.

Rumored to be the precursor of the classic French onion soup, the panade is like a caramelized onion bread pudding. Soft and satisfying, this dish is excellent comfort food for kicking around the house and recharging the mettle.

It’s so easy to put together, in fact, that I think I’ll take a paint-by-numbers approach and relate the recipe through a jaunty pictorial with minimal interjections.

Ok. Get some onions (reference top photo if you’re confused).

Slice them.

Caramelize them (a bay leaf and a little garlic couldn’t hurt).

Get some cheese; this is Gruyere, but you can freestyle it.

Grate it.

Layer old sliced bread with onions and cheese. Repeat until you reach the top.

Pour in salt water that tastes like a well seasoned soup; it should come about ¾ of the way up.

Bake at 375˚F for about an hour. It helps to keep it covered in foil for the first half.

Eat.

We had ours with roasted baby carrots in a dill-butter sauce and a nice green salad with spinach, red peppers, avocado, and walnuts.

You should have yours, well, soon.

And of course we’d like to extend a very special thanks to Derrick of obsessionwithfood.com for hosting this 25th stellar IMBB. Your hard work is most appreciated sir.

Cook it up peoples.

-L. Pants

Tagged with: IMBB # 25 + Bread

IMBB #22: Klaatu Pasta Nikto

Recently, on a dark and bitterly cold Tuesday morning, I was inducted into a Secret Society; a Society shrouded in flour and water and sometimes eggs. Yes my friends, I was tapped to join the Noodly Brotherhood.

I showed up dressed in black (with a small white towel… and a tiny apron, fine) in the back of Vespaio – the finest Italian restaurant in Austin. It was 5 a.m., the mythical Pasta Hour. I can’t delve too deeply into details dear readers, but in a multi-hour affair we were anointed with truffle oil, the air was perfumed with burning bay and sage and we were flogged with sheaths of winter wheat, the hardest of the wheats, as you know. And the kneading- oh the kneading was copious and intense. There was also an olive race, but of this I shall not speak.

Painful theatrics aside, I have had the pleasure of hand-making pasta “professionally” for the last few months. Really I’m somewhat of a pasta-whore as I have a borderline unhealthy affinity for the stuff and have been known to do strange things to obtain it. Such as getting a job, making pasta.

Pasta making in a restaurant does have several benefits however. One is that we own a huge pasta machine with the Roller of Doom “Bane of Fingers and Scourge of Board Scrapers”.

The upside being that this industrial beast makes it possible to work dough made of durum flour; a chore that by hand is virtually impossible. The durum gives the finished product a great bite and a particularly nice mouthfeel- closer to the dried pasta you buy rather than the softer homemade varieties.

Another of the perks of this new job is that we end up throwing out a lot of scraps. So on occasion I rescue a few of the stragglers destined for dustbindom and bring them home for a new life of deliciousness. On this particular IMBB occasion, I introduced them to a happy passel of clams and they all hit it off quite nice as Spaghetti alle Vongole.

I’m not a cookbook, so I’m not going to get all numbery and specific with you. I pretty much made it up to fit my tastes and those of the incomparable Mme. Pants. I’ll give you a “so’s it was kinda like this” rundown, though:

Buy some fresh smallish clams. Figure 2/3 to 3/4 of a pound per person. I put them in about a gallon of water with a couple teaspoons of salt added and kept them in the fridge for an hour to purge. Does this help? Hell if I know, but it makes me feel better. And give them a quick scrub before you use them. That’ll make everyone feel better.

Heat up some butter and oil in skillet. Remember, it’s all going in the sauce so only use as much as you want to eat later. Sauté some chopped garlic, a couple pinches of chili flake, and a few torn basil leaves. Give it couple of minutes without harassing it.  Check your salt.  Always keep checking your salt.

Now deglaze with white wine. Add a can of peeled whole tomatoes that you’ve crushed roughly. Add a cup of stock, preferably seafood, but whatever. Reduce it for ten minutes or so.

Toss in your cool, shiny, freshly brushed clams and a tablespoon of cold butter. Cover the whole crazy, good smelling pan with another skillet or a pie pan or some foil or something MacGyverish that you build out of thumbtacks or some such.

Let it steam for five minutes or until your clam friends open up. Dump in your drained, perfectly al dente noodles. Toss them with the shellfish and sauce and let them all get to know each other for a couple of minutes.

Garnish with parsley and fresh pepper. Serve it up. It’ll make you friends.

And here's a closer look 'cause i know you want one.

As a special bonus addendum to all you people that made it to the end (you probably watch movie credits too) I’m including one of the best, most freaking awesome appetizers of all time. You guessed it, Fresh Mozzarella Grilled on Lemon Leaves. I just can’t get too much capitalization.

It’s super easy. Wipe some clean lemon leaves with olive oil. Put a small piece of fresh mozzarella and a touch of garlic on top. Grill until the cheese melts. Squeeze on a few drops of lemon juice and that’s good antipasti. Booyah.

-L. Pants

Tagged with: IMBB # 22 + Noodle

(And my goodness - Amy already has the roundup up! Here is a link to see the rest of the tasty entries.)

Is My Blog Burning XX: Touché Soufflé (Parsnip and Cheddar)

Oooh. Don’t mess with me chumps, I’m Mister Fancy-schamncy soufflé. I gots a hardcore reputation for not playin’ real nice-like and I’ll make ya all look like a bunch of assolopes if you try to bake me up. You gotta mix me just right. Don’t breathe too hard. Don’t be jigglin’ me around. Best to not open that oven once you puts me in. But are you sure that it’s at the exak right temperature? Will I be too dry? Whoops, don’t walk too hard in the kitchen. That’s right, one wrong look from you and I’ll fall faster than a CIA operative’s name from Karl Rove’s mouth. It’s just how I roll.

Why you gotta front soufflé? As far as I can tell you just got served. Served up all crispy, fluffy, golden brown, moist and delicious. That’s right. Who’s the bitch now?

For too long soufflés have been vilified and posted with double black diamonds, when in reality, they’re more like neighborly blue squares. What? You don’t ski? Anyway, point being, soufflés get a bad rap, but they’re easy, tasty and fun and people should make them more.

For this edition of Is My Blog Burning, Mme. Pants and I decided to go savory and whip up a parsnip and cheddar soufflé. We figured it was a good idea because you can never find enough excuses to eat more parsnips.

So, start by peeling a pound of that pigmentally challenged cousin of the carrot, give it a half inch dice and simmer it off for about fifteen minutes in 2-3 cups of stoutly salted water with a bay leaf floating around. When everything’s nice and soft, toss the leaf, keep a cup of the liquid and then puree the drained parsnip chunks until smooth.

Wait. Actually, start by getting out six eggs and letting them come to room temperature and then the parsnip stuff. No, wait. Start by getting a big drink and then the eggs and then all that parsnip crap. Yeah. (Be sure to get your wife a drink too or she’ll just stare at you with those big, sad doe eyes.)

Meanwhile (back at the Batcave), make a roux with about four tablespoons of butter and flour. Cook it ‘til it’s golden then whisk in the tasty reserved parsnip juice. Stir that until it’s thick and looks a little like gluey cream gravy.

Now stir in 1½ or 2 cups of grated cheddar, the parsnip puree, and a tablespoon of chopped sage. Separate your eggs. Stir in the six yolks. Good. You’re almost there.

If there is a trick to soufflés and I’m not saying there is, it’s all in the whites. Much like with laundry, you don’t really have to worry about the colored stuff. If something gets screwed, it’s probably the whites.

Here’re three quick tips to beating egg whites:

1) Make sure you don’t get any yolk mixed in

2) Start with them at room temperature

3) Add a little acid. This helps with volume, stabilization and moisture retention.  Cream of tartar is best, lemon juice or vinegar work in a pinch; avoid hydrochloric and lysergic acid diethylamide unless you’re going for a whole different thing.

4) So I said three. So what? You want a piece? DON’T over beat them! Then they’re just gross. Feeling now fully empowered, whip your whites to frothy, creamy, peaks of excitement.

See, easy. Take half and fold it into the parsnipy, cheesy, pasty stuff, then fold in the other half.

Grease and flour an appropriate receptacle (don’t be nasty) and fill it about 2/3 full. Oh, your oven should be pre-heated to 400ºF. Pop that baby in and check on it in about half and hour. Contrary to popular belief, it is not certain soufflé death if you crack the oven to look at it. Just do it fast and sparingly. You’re not twelve and it’s not the girls’ locker room, so easy tiger.

There. It’s done when it’s big and poofy and beautifully brown. Serve it quick and be generous with the portions because everyone needs more soufflé.

We had ours with a nice salad dressed with a warm sherry and shallot vinaigrette and a lovely Cotes-du-Rhone. Insert lip smacking here.

Stay fluffy people and don’t let the soufflés grind you down.

(And thanks to Kitchen Chick for choosing a great theme and hosting a great Is My Blog Burning!   Part One of the roundup is savory, and posted - yay!  there we are!  And here's a link to part two - sweet soufflees!  (My fault - it's been up for several days.))

Tagged with: IMBB # 20 + Souffle

L. Pants