This past weekend Rachel and I took the opportunity to get our asses to DC for the Stewart/Colbert mega-Rally.
It was crazy fun, emphasis on the crazy. Part of the difficulty was that the event planners had permitted for 60,000 and a solid quarter million showed up. 250,000 people is a lot of dudes and/or ladies and even though we showed up early, I was regretting not coming pre-greased.
At the low point in our search for a patch to call our own, Rachel was literally making the strangling gesture at me and her eyes were on fire. Somehow (I'm gonna go ahead and say divine intervention from a Judeo-Christian God), a small clearing opened up. My quick thinking wife immediately threw herself down spread-eagle and flailed until her uncle Erik tossed down a blanket and then we all licked it so everyone knew it was ours and to keep the f* off.
All the insanity did not disturb The Chillest Dog in the World.
We even had a go-go gadget cooler that not only had drinks but also miraculously made Girlie slightly taller than the unwashed mob surrounding us.
It ended up being a pretty sweet location where we could see the stage and had a great view of a couple big screens. As it got closer to Rally time, a sort of critical density was reached and going vertical became a legitimate position choice.
Even the port-o-lets weren't safe.
Now do you believe it was crowded?
So many people showed up that it entirely crashed the phone and data networks. Pretty much zero information exchange was possible.
This guy wasn't giving in though. He had just put down his bull horn after yelling repeatedly, "Everyone hang up your phones! I've got to send a text message!" Not sure if it worked but you can't say he didn't try.
This is what it looks like when 250,000 people do the wave.
As a sort of pre-show, Adam and Jamie from MythBusters showed up and had the crowd do various strange stuff. My favorite was when they brought out a seismologist and had us all jump at once to try to simulate an earthquake. With a little practice we were able to generate the energy of a Smart Car hitting a Yugo. In your face San Andreas fault line!
The people attending were by far the most interesting part. I don't want to get too caught up in comparisons to the Glenn Beck Rally, but I seriously doubt that in his ADA section they had a clean cut guy in a pin stripe suit signing along in true thug style to a T.I. song.
This is not that guy.
Since it had been hyped as Sanity and/or Fear, naturally there were people taking sides. If you want to get a handle on stereotypes, here's an example of exactly how much sense it made.
Yes. It's all so clear to me now.
Lots of other characters made an appearance as well. Plenty of Lincolns showed, but this guy gets extra props for actually coming in stilts.
One Must be Reasonable, Lest One be Curb-Stomped.
Bears were a theme of course, but bears behind guys in Chubacca shirts were a little more scarce.
Perhaps because she kept talking about him Glenn Beck did show up and hit on Rachel for a while.
Several teabags made their way in, but I appreciated how this one had the thoughful extra protection of a foil hat.
Also fairly common where Mad Hatters. This guy's outfit was particularly nice though and he kept jogging around looking for "Sarah" and would run away screaming if you told him that you made less less than $200,000 a year. "My god! Where are the real Americans?"
A plurality of Captain Americas was on hand to spread the love,
but only one (which makes sense if you think about it) Flying Spaghetti Monster was in attendance.
I was also comforted to see that some fellow Lone Stars showed up to represent.
While the speeches and performances where all quite enjoyable, I've got to hand it to our fellow rally goes who turned up en masse with some pretty stellar homemade signs.
Catch cool signs including the best of the best after the jump!